Likes: Smirnoff Ice™ more than anybody else, ever; GOALS GOALS GOALS; Tour

Dislikes: Haircuts; Missing Tour

Two truths and a lie:
Once climbed Mt Everest wearing nothing but his Narwhals speedos due to the inherant warming glow of being a Narwhal.

Wears a Wig, he is infact bald.

Absolute liability when liquid, should never be left unsupervised

Likes: Enrique Iglesias, Being a hero, Wobbling

Dislikes: Tour, People having fun, 

Two Truths and a lie:
He is a stand up comedian

Ed currently holds the world record for the most number of assist in a sporting season ever

His middle name is in fact Shenanigans

Likes: Children, Having Children, Falling down stairs

Dislikes: Having Children, Passing, Swimming

A bachelor at heart, this stunning gentleman will have you dying at your knees. His strategy of always having a cigarette box on him has led to much success, but also a significant casualties. Easily the most dangerous Narwhal to be around.

Likes: Mayonaisse, Squirting Mayonaisse, Getting pinted

Dislikes: His Appendix, "The South", 

Looking for: Someone from the proper part of the country, preferably from a city with a lower GDP than  Croydon. He has been compared to Sasha Baron Cohen's character in the "Brothers of Grimsby".

Likes: Enemy intelligence; Real Politik; saving shots with his face

Dislikes: Teeth; having teeth; saving shots with his hands

Looking for: Someone with their own teeth and who's good with their hands. Preferably well traveled with an intimate knowledge of Sudanese and Kazakh politics. Does not work for the "Foreign Office".

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Likes: Bar Maids, 

Dislikes: Sharing,

Two truths and a lie:
Met his current bae by ignoring her for 6 months and then going all in upstairs @ the Treehouse;

He uses glue and spare pubes to fill his beard out

He has chundered at least 2 times at every WT Narwhals social

Likes: Red wine; complaining; hiding under tables; Chundering in Ubers

Dislikes: Red wine; nice shoes; the untitled hoi polloi

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Our resident Kings rabble rouser, a man constantly in denial from his true calling - reforming the landed gentry. This man has as many goals as he does titles and yet the team wouldn't feel right without him [Ed - it would]

Likes: McDonalds; shit cider; nerd activities; majors on halfway

Dislikes: Vegetables; swimming; shooting

Two truths and a lie:

He is his fathers' favourite child

He has never not been TJ in any activity ever

Within 30 seconds of talking to him he will tell you about this shit unknown band from South London

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Likes: Being grumpy; Gatwick Airport; a backshot; fighting Amphibs

Dislikes: Training; Easy Jet

Looking for:

A troop - Scout master is easily excited by the thought of Kumbaya, sitting rounds camp fires and badges. Knows the odd dirty song. Will sing them all, repeatedly, when liquid.

Likes: Getting punched; masks, Frazzles

Dislikes: Bacon Fries; rhinoplasty,  

Two truths and a lie:
He is a member of the Latvian mafia

He was almost deported to Rwanda 

He has broken his nose in every game he has played for the Narwhals

Likes: Cookbooks; patents; Tickets to the Gun show; shooting in training

Dislikes: Swimming; shooting in games; cooking

Likes: Swimming pool toilets; hair product; "Making Some Noise" (TM)

Dislikes: Hair; tents; playing waterpolo 

Likes: Lobs; titanium; Lady Gaga; lobbing

Dislikes: His hips; looking up

Likes: Punching; winning the Catas Trophy; shooting over the bar (could be said for most of us tbf...)

Dislikes: Southern Rail; Thameslink; winning the Catas Trophy

Likes: Away games in Serie B; playing Croydon; meat and cheese

Dislikes: Cigarette boxes; sharing meat and cheese

Likes: The Rules; a drinking game; shallow pools; disappearing

Dislikes: Rulebreakers; long term commitments

Likes: Swimming; Cycling; Running. In that order; socials

Dislikes: Polo; the Narwhals; playing for the Narhwals; turning up.

Likes: Beer, Wine, Alcohol, Limencello, Guiness, Gin and Tonics

Dislikes: Soda Water, His shoulder, 

Likes: Banter, Consistancy, 

Dislikes: Banter, Consistancy,

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