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Dont. Be. Shit.
A notable air of confidence was around the lido poolside - Matt showing off his massive brand new balls as always, Dave Leach berating...
zacfinch11
Mar 30, 20252 min read
From Foe to Friend
After embarrassing the Narwhals in the South London derby last week, the last thing we needed was to call upon the Leeches to join the...
zacfinch11
Mar 20, 20251 min read


A Table with a View: A Night of Water Polo Mediocrity
There are moments in life when one is graced with a table overlooking the most breathtaking of vistas - a candlelit balcony perched above...
zacfinch11
Mar 18, 20253 min read
The Stormzy Meal
We’ve all seen Stormzy’s go to order at McDonalds, but what about our might Narwhals I hear you say? We’ll an away game in Essex v Easter...
zacfinch11
Mar 12, 20252 min read


Mighty Narwhal Bled Dry by a Pack of Leeches - A Guest Editorial.
In the latest installment of the "War at Whitgift" on February 26, 2025, the South London Leeches finally broke their regular season...
zacfinch11
Mar 7, 20251 min read
Water polo match report; 19th February 2025
This report has been redacted under the requirements of the official secrets act of 1957 and revisions in 1982 and 2025. 10 Narwhals...
zacfinch11
Mar 3, 20253 min read


Heavenly or Haunted: Hornchurch Toilet Review
A long and tedious journey, was it worth it or not - polo aside this time. The multiple delayed trains and large amount of chicken before...
zacfinch11
Mar 2, 20252 min read
Battle the Second: Kingston 2 – The Winter League Fray
Through sore muscles and weary bones, the Narwhals took to the seas once more on Thursday, February 13th, sailing into hostile waters at...
zacfinch11
Feb 19, 20252 min read
The Narwhals Set Sail for Victory: A Swashbuckling Tale of Triumph
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather ‘round as I regale ye with the grand tale of the mighty Narwhals, who braved the treacherous waters of...
zacfinch11
Feb 19, 20252 min read


Lewisham Vs Narwhals: South Eastern London Toilet Blunders
After spending several anxious moments searching the grotty corridors of the Glass something Leisure Centre, I finally located the...
zacfinch11
Feb 12, 20251 min read
Defence FTW
Victory in the first home game of 2025! A 16-8 win against Kingston 2s built from an excellent defensive performance, some good counter...
zacfinch11
Jan 29, 20252 min read
The Great North
We played a game of waterpolo today but that does t really matter. The big event for the day is that I had the honour of completing the...
zacfinch11
Jan 23, 20254 min read
PGMOL can do one
*disclaimer, if Dave “Coote” Leach or the other Leeches ref are reading this, we are only joking and we very much appreciate your support...
zacfinch11
Dec 13, 20242 min read


Forza Narwhali: Gladiatorial triumph over Blue Marlin
Whitgift pool bore witness to a true spectacle the other week, as the Narwhals staged an epic comeback to claim their first victory of...
zacfinch11
Dec 5, 20243 min read
A Day of Remembrance
As Armistice day came and went, we are remembering those who made the brave journey up to High Barnet on Monday to play the first of two...
zacfinch11
Nov 19, 20244 min read
ChatGPT be more critical of WT Narwhals' performance
Date: March 03, 2024 Location: Whitgift School Aquatic Centre Final Score: WT Narwhals 10 - Citizens 21 Overview In an action-packed...
zacfinch11
Nov 9, 20242 min read
Home or Away? It’s hard to say…
Venue: Our pool, our time slot, but somehow, we were the away team… home advantage? Plucky away team underdogs? Hard to say… In a rather...
zacfinch11
Nov 6, 20244 min read


Royal Flush or Total Wipeout? A Loo-se Look at Eton's New Throne Rooms:
As we made our way up the long drive and approached the grand, red-brick bastion of athletic prowess that is Eton School's new sports...
zacfinch11
Oct 6, 20242 min read
Sexy Narwhals Swarm To Victory
This column has had plenty of pain to ruminate on over the past year. However, victories have started to come in thick and fast since...
zacfinch11
Oct 6, 20242 min read


Hampton Lido: A Thoroughly Flushed Experience
⭐ Rating: 7.5/10 - Would Wipe Again ⭐ To celebrate our first floodlit water polo experience, we thought it was about time we brought life...
zacfinch11
Sep 19, 20243 min read
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